1. |
the only light
02:25
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remind me the taste
you made in your mouth
unwinding your tape
i'm climbing it down
you brandish your blood
i'm keeping mine hid
say you want to be loved
but never like this
you've said it all along:
the only light is our own
the only light is our own
it's lonely lining the road
but the only light is our own
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2. |
two invitations
06:06
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two invitations came to my address
they must have mailed them before you left
the wedding of our closest friends
read like a guarantee i'd see you again
i took a seat across the aisle
they gave us separate tables on opposite sides
a few drinks deep i stepped outside
only to look up and meet your eyes
you were sweating through your dress
you said: "why do people get married in july?"
you shared your cigarettes
we lit a hundred at a time
"what was that verse they read?"
yeah, "love is patient, love is kind..."
couldn't be a safer bet
but it feels truer every time
even if it's a lie
there will be a time
to speak our minds
just not tonight
just when it seemed like we were getting along
they took requests, they played that song
felt like the lord was trying do us in
i held your hair back while you got sick
"don't get it on your dress"
"why do people get married all the time?"
you'd share your cigarettes
if we could only find a light
"what was that verse they read again?"
yeah, "love is patient, love is kind...."
couldn't be a safer bet
but it feels truer every time
even if it's a lie
there will be a time
to speak our minds
just not tonight
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3. |
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what's broken cannot be fixed
best you can do is try to learn how to live with it
lord knows our saviour was no stranger to this
when he dragged his body out of that cave he'd been living in
he took a room out at that holiday inn
figured he had a couple of days he might kill in it
but if i were any closer to him
i'd have been placed inside that room by the gideons
lights out if you want it
closed eyes, closed eyes
lay back like you wanted me to
just don't bite, don't bite
honest, ms. policewoman
i was only minding my own business
he was like this when i walked in
just hanging from the wall like a crucifix
she said "i've seen a couple cases like this one -
hard to say if it's some divine joke or just coincidence -
but i've never seen a suspect admitting
that they'd been placed inside the room by the gideons"
no livin', no livin', no livin'... amen
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4. |
in the red
03:18
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i hear music from the other room
voices bending in and out of tune
you say lately you feel empty all the time
price you pay for opening your mind
but sometimes you almost get me right
sometimes you almost get me right
some loves will never pay your debts
so now i'm always in the red
just when things were finally looking up
found a way to really fuck it up
found out i'd been lying this whole time
price you pay for closing both your eyes
but sometimes you almost get me right
sometimes you almost get me right
some loves will never pay your debts
so now i'm always in the red
always in the red
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5. |
the fifth
03:02
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was it easy enough
to find another to love?
something breezy and boyish
in the sound of your voice
betrayed another one boiling
your blood
and do you stretch their skin tight?
hold it up to that sky at night?
with that pencil you trace
the paths of their veins
to form constellations
of light
said "if i do what you ask
could you give me a little something back?
i ain't asking for much
maybe loosen these cuffs
give me a couple of puffs
from that pack?"
and you in that customary dress
for a judas impression
you tried for that kiss
but when you leaned in
pressed your lips to that partition
of glass
keep clenching your fists
and biting your lip
as you hang on that fifth
all your life
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6. |
a road in my mind
05:04
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carrying your tune
like something that could bruise you
a catch you'd just as soon cut loose
always at arm's length
something that your friend said
sticking in your head again
holding all your notes
like a sling around a broke bone
a wind that you can slowly blow
carrying that scent
of kissing off your lipstick
and the glitter of your whiskered skin
but the note that you sung
finally pulled down that sun
and left a hole in the sky
now there's no light to find you by
but there's a road in my mind
lying on the floor
like hanging on that fourth chord
just leaves you wanting more and more
flailing all your limbs
for the fourth, the fifth, the sixth
it's hard to follow, isn't it?
but the chord that you strum
finally pulled down that sun
and left a hole in the sky
now there's no light to find you by
feel you slowly unwind
from the spools of my life
but there's a road in my mind
there's a road in my mind
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7. |
way past dark
02:40
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please ignore my mood
things haven't been good
since i left you
and a few too many times
i might have implied
i had someone else in mind
so when you're feeling scared
i bring up what your friend said
because it worked for them
if nothing is at stake
why don't i feel
some sense of relief?
these aren't your friends
this is not a plan
it's just a circumstance
maybe i don't understand
and it's time for work
now it's getting late
it's way past dark
watch your fingers shake
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8. |
("might as well...")
00:21
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9. |
receiver
06:02
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i was wishing you were here
i couldn't shake that feeling
held the phone against my ear
heard you on the other end
don't remember what you said but
i do remember what it meant
to think those cables curled
halfway around the world so
you and i could trade some words
made it strange to say
but i could almost see your face there
though you were miles away
i hope that you're receiving what i send
though the meaning teeters on the fence
in between the speaker and what you said
sometimes it bends
something i couldn't name
i sensed it right away, babe
i could read it on your face
you said: "i know it isn't right
but i can't help the way i feel sometimes
you were in my dream last night"
"loving someone new
looked like the one you used to
hold beneath a younger moon
and now that i'm awake
it's like what separates these two planes
finally broke beneath the weight"
"of what you receive and what you send
though the meaning teeters on the fence
in between the dream and what you dreamt
sometimes it bends"
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10. |
("...with my soul")
00:30
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11. |
your orange and blues
05:32
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you are impossible
tree uprooted but bearing fruit
for those bad men to pull
you'd think you'd been damned by god
to a life of loving just anybody
who passes along
yet time moves back and forth
from those older bodies to those younger bodies
we lived in before
i'm so out of tune
with your orange and blues
but yours was the truest
love i ever had
a morning i warmly recall
see you in that kitchen with that floral printing
that patterned the wall
you fought on that telephone
it sounded so one-sided, you hung up crying
"just leave me alone"
you said "time still marches on
the beauty drains from these ugly faces
as quick as it comes"
you're harsh with your words
when you're begging to be heard
but even at your worst
babe, you're really not bad
i'm so out of tune
with your orange and blues
yet yours was the truest
love i ever had
but maybe we should talk about that night
when last you came passing through my life
we agreed it'd be the first and only time
but lately i can't put you from my mind
can't help feeling like you're feeling like i do
with them orange and blues, them orange and blues and all
i've got them orange and blues, them orange and blues and all
goddamn orange and blues, them orange and blues and all...
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12. |
easy or free
04:52
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before i was saved
me and the boy who was chasing me
spent all our days
at the pier
we would pretend
that we smoked cigarettes
when the cold turned our breath
into steam
we were young and our lungs were still clean
but now nothing is easy or free
his finger and thumb
made the shape of a gun
that he held to the warmth
of my cheek
i swore to his god
and prayed a curse on my mother
till he knew i would not
dare to speak
and reveal all the secrets i keep
he learned nothing is easy or free
on some of those nights
when the stars were colliding
and murmuring like
a machine
the sounds and the smells
would remind us of sex
that we hadn't had yet
but in dreams
we weren't old yet, our souls were still clean
until you took that question from me
i wandered around
until i finally found
myself out where the boundaries
bleed
the lights at the edge
lit all the roads and the bridges
but the one that would lead
you to me
as if you had some better place to be
i learned nothing is easy or free
now i know, you know...
nothing is easy
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Little Kid Toronto, Ontario
little kid was formed in the year of our lord 2009.
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